ffcyz now guess what, you motherfuckers out there listening to my songs is like witnessing the Christmas morning of a 5-year-old whose mom is the CEO of Toys R' Us i think the album could - no, it should have been better doesn't rock as much as i wanted it to it sounds kinda flat although i wanted it real fat and i sound like a prat, not a cool cat - what's that? whatdidyouexpec? some kind of hip hop pet sounds? sergeant pepper with a fat ass beat? (yeah right) ain't reinventing the wheel, not revealing a new reel with zeal and the power to heal the stagnancy that i feel no - we! my buddy gavin and i, yeah we'll make it right, yeah and you people can be part of it with lust or with spite every second of the day i'm gonna make your life bright -er, gimme the lighter, i wanna fight ya sucka mcs, ya da hofmeister c is in da house and you'd better get used to it, dork! if you think this song is ffc - you're right what i say is not what i wanna hear if you think this song is ffc - you're right you might think this song is ffc and I agree "you're a badass MC" that's what I wanna hear i guess you might call it midlife crisis yeah, I’ve run out of booze, but i still know where the ice is ze fish goes hip hop - R.A.P. - that's me a selfmade master of ceremony almost forty but i got tons of dem skills and the other MCs are just Benny Hills don't need no weed, don't need no pills because i'm true and pure the ladies go schmilz-schmilz-schmilz (yeah, the ladies go schmilz) this might sound more confident, more self-reliant than i really am although i do know what they will say, i don’t really give a damn “not really” means, however, that i know i ain’t the mc that the world has waited for and i must say that i agree still i defy the laws of hip hop, still i put myself to test after all the saying goes that for the wicked ain't no rest now ridicule me, laugh at me and beg me to stop my show but i'm still hoping that [it ain't necessarily so] if you think this song is ffc - you're right what i say is not what i wanna hear if you think this song is ffc - you're right if you think this song is ffc - you're right what i say is not what i wanna hear if you think this song is ffc - you're right if you believe that you find an mc who is better than da one and only hofmeister c (which is me) i'll say "behold!" but then again if you don't find one i say "remember what i told ya!" and i'd want you to say sorry and debase yourself i'd want you to go down on your knees and let me slap your face not that i'm a sadist or a rapist, but you'd be the queerest now run, forrest! run, forrest! run, forrest! run! phew, what's happening to me? i'm all in sweat it seems it's not healthy for me to diss and beset someone who's not even existent, someone who's not even there all this is so inconsistent, almost too much for me to bear so i guess the one i'm fighting is the man in the mirror but thanks to whoever-i-could-thank-for-that i've got my very own pyrrha she's the one that makes me stand firm on the planks of my ark the one that effuses immense masses of light when it's dark she's the one who tells me what is possible and what is not she thinks that i'm a good man, but she doesn't think i'm a god but i do! i'm not saying i'm anything less than that i'm not fishing for compliments, i'm not cutting the crap i rap! i rap! i rap! did you really think those words were mine that I diminish myself fuck off & finish yourself did you really think those words were mine (now check this out) i can't be beaten 'cause i ain't competin' don't belong to no scene 'cause my scene is just me and if you wanna join i'll be gone

friction of an exhibitionist i was just wonderin' what to talk about something you might like and then i thought why not just reflect on the process of writing rap lyrics when you're not used to it here i go - i'm stuck already amidst the inability of creating a substantial rap song call me mc loss for words, might not be round for long i'm sure that's what you expected from someone who is not in the scene, tries hard to be mean drops a "motherfucker" here and there should rather sing along to "come on eileen" but hey - here i am and i'm here for good i'm sure i'm not rapping as good as i should but you know what? i don't care i don't care i don't care (and i don't give a damn) cause nobody's forcin' me to do what i'm doing now and i'm confident enough that i'll work it out somehow so far i've managed doin' all the things i wanted to do tell me please why should i fail now? tell me please why should i do anything like that? why should i fuck up? i pluck up my courage yeah, c'mon now - do you get the message? and the message ain't love, it ain't one of affection 'cause this is my show and that's why i'm the main attraction da hofmeister c - yeah, that's me and i do guarantee that my hip hop degree is squealing with glee from forehead to my knee and down to my toes and back to my nose to my groin! what about you? guess i'm flipping a coin you're dead, i'm sorry but you needn't have to worry cause i will let you live i am not in a hurry might be even worse for you to see and hear that i'm the genius, i'm the pinnacle of your fear despite the fact that i'm the new mc in town i turn those frowns of the many disbelievers upside down [diana ross] i was raised in the eighties, so me and my mateys were witnesses to the raise of the rap hip hop or whatever you might wanna call it - does it matter? i don't really care, classification is just chatter run dmc and the beastie boys were the first bands of choice so at the top of our voices we demanded our right to party we walked this way and we believed in the illuminati heutzutage ist hip hop nur noch dicke hose, quatsch mit sosse, dicke ketten, dicke titten, dicke knarren insgesamt substanzlose scheiße mit 'nem riesengroßen image drumherum wer braucht das, wer findet das gut? wer ist so arm, dass er sich darüber definieren muss? wer hat so kleine eier und wer glaubt so 'nen stuss? ganz besonders schlimm ist der rotz, der da kommt aus berlin für sowas hab ich kein verständnis und 'ne pulle strychnin hier - wenn du aggro bist, dann holt dich das runter immer munter, hau weg, die kagge, jawoll mann, kotzt ihr mich an. wie armselig kann man eigentlich sein? eure mütter könnten glatt eure schwestern sein whatever i'm neither here to save the world nor the dignity of hip hop i'm running out of words, so maybe i should

opportunities when i wake up in the morning it's the same every day it's just piss, eat, wash, dress, go to work hey it's not as if i have another life in the bag like some instant coffee, instant life what is the consequence, what could be my goal? i've been to many places in the world but not to the south pole, not to the north pole never gone to no hooker, never been on the dole should i take every drug that is around? should i love as many babes as i can? should i found a big company that makes me real rich? should i have myself tattooed? should i have sex with a midget? should i go to see limp bizkit or the rolling stones leave cologne, go to new york to rest my bones? should i take this microphone, shove it up my ass or should i let this opportunity pass (once again) when i look at the weather it's the same every year it's just rain, snow, rain, sun, clouds, rain hey it's not as if i have another life in the bag like some instant soup, instant life what can i strive for, what is there for me to do i've spent a lot of bucks on things but only left pee and poo should i write a book myself? should i quit my job? should i join the foreign legion? call myself Bob? should i dye my hair blonde? should i buy a pet or order viagra on the internet? should i drive faster than allowed? should i join the crowd? should i be real proud of my life or should i drop out? or would this be a cop-out? would it mean i'm too weak to make something of my life now should i take this microphone and shove it up my ass or should i let this opportunity pass (once again) when i wake up in the morning it's the same every day it's just piss, eat, wash, dress, go to work hey it's not as if i have another life in the bag like some instant coffee, instant life what? what? what? what? what.